Unfixing Our Bayonets!

“Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.” ~Proverbs 17:9 NLT

Far too often in our world when conflict occurs the most common response is to hold tight and fast to our position in the disagreement and not give any ground to the other person or party in the conflict!

In the Marines they have a term for this and that is “fixed bayonets combat”! A bayonet (from French baïonnette) is a knife, dagger, sword, or spike-shaped weapon designed to fit in, on, over or underneath the muzzle of a rifle, musket or similar weapon, effectively turning the gun into a spear. This weapon was used in the original World Wars in close quarters combat and has recently been less commonly used because of the modern advancements in warfare and weaponry.

However, this is more than an adequate example of how many people both inside God’s church and outside the church deal with conflict. We attach our hurts in the form of bayonets to our pretend weaponry and we stand at close quarters attempting to defend and strike all in the same breath!

But as Solomon, one of the wisest to have walked on this planet points out in this section of the Wisdom literature he complied during his time with us suggests, the better strategy is to learn to FORGIVE a wrong or fault committed against us!

Now, when I read this and write this I personally know just how difficult this is to actually carry out in a world where we are often confronted with challenges and struggles associated with relational conflict!

Still, that does not mean that Solomon is mistaken with his advice to us. In fact, he further points out that IF we do not forgive the wrong committed against us that it has the potential to destroy even the most solid of friendships and relationships in our lives!

Time and time again as a person and a pastor I have come across and been acquainted with people who have held on for far too long to a wrong or hurt that someone or some party has inflicted on them. The result of this reality is that for the most part they have dwelt on the pain, the hurt, and the suffering to a point that it is poisoning them and every one around them.

That is why Solomon in all his wisdom tells us that the best route when faced with inevitable offences is to learn to FORGIVE and to deal in LOVE with our offenders. 

Now, let me just say that FORGIVENESS from a biblical perspective is NOT about “FORGIVE & FORGET”! The reality is simply this, there are lessons we learn along the way and we need to forgive just as Jesus forgives us for our trespasses and wrong choices along the way. However, sometimes we must never forget the things that come our way because they are life lessons that we’re called to build on and grow from in this thing called the journey of life and faith. Now, learning to discern between the two sides of this coin is a lifelong endeavour that requires us to spend time in God’s WORD… in prayer… and with His people in order to allow ourselves to be shaped by the situations and circumstances we encounter along the way.

In this little verse, Solomon challenges all of us to FORGIVE and seek to deal in LOVE with those who have offended us or hurt us as we have made our way along the journey we are all on together. The reality is, we will all be hurt at some point BUT the main point is not “IF” or “WHEN” it is how we react and move forward that matters most! Learning to react positively rather than negatively will impact the quality of our lives in significant ways. And learning to react in LOVE is something that requires a God’s love infecting our lives so deeply that we seek reconciliation and restoration and we “stand down” when conflict comes our way!

Unfixing the bayonets in life…

Rev Trev